Anal Sex for Beginners: Tips for Your First Time

Anal sex is probably something you’ve considered trying, but were too intimidated by the idea to commit. It can be an overwhelming concept to think about, and can result in a potentially uncomfortable and messy situation that only comes from dabbling in territories previously uncharted.

Yet, anal sex can be an especially pleasurable and exciting experience for both partners. It’s important to go into it being prepared and knowledgeable, and being absolutely comfortable with the situation at hand.

There are plenty of tips and pieces of advice to remember if you plan on engaging in anal sex with your partner, some of which can enhance the experience and altogether make for a more relaxed and pleasurable time. Here are a few tips for beginners looking to try anal sex for the first time:

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Don’t go straight for the gold

Anal sex doesn’t have to be a wholly independent experience. Mix it up with foreplay in the beginning to spice things up. Becoming fully aroused beforehand will make the transition into anal sex a lot smoother and more comfortable. The anal sphincter, the muscle at the entrance of the anus, is the most important muscle that contributes to anal sex pleasure. Making sure that muscle is completely relaxed will help make anal sex all the more enjoyable.

In order for anal sex to happen, your body needs to be completely relaxed, and having a tight anal sphincter can make things exceedingly difficult. Having an orgasm before you turn over to anal sex can help relax you even more, and prepare you for the rest. Once you’ve exhausted the typical foreplay routine and are feeling ready for more adventure, switch over to the actual penetrative part of anal sex.

Be mindful of what you eat beforehand

Anal sex means delving into a part of the body that is not typically toyed with on a daily basis. Because of this, it’s important to make sure everything runs smoothly, which can mean preparing for the event by staying away from certain foods that can trigger bowel movements, such as coffee and spicy foods that can cause discomfort.


In addition, also make sure that the area is properly cleaned beforehand to avoid any messy situations. Rinsing out the anal area can help decrease the amount of fecal matter left inside after bowel movements. We’re all human, so it’s quite a common occurrence, but if you’re one of those people easily grossed out by bodily waste, you might want to take extra precautions beforehand.

Get to know yourself first

Just like it’s important to familiarize yourself with your vagina and clitoris for better vaginal sex, it’s also important to get to know this area as well and become comfortable with it. Associate yourself with the anus hole by poking your finger around it, and gently rubbing and massaging the area to get a better idea of what feels good to you. Experiment with easing your finger in it. Having solo time is the perfect opportunity to do this at your own pace and better set yourself up for the real thing. Make sure you put some lube on your finger first to accentuate the sensations.

Lube up

If you’ve never done anal sex before, the first time can be difficult and uncomfortable. Stocking up on lube and using the right amount of it can help make the process a little smoother and easier for both partners. The anus is not self-lubricating, so it can be a more difficult area to venture into. The first time might hurt a bit, especially if you’ve never tried it before, and lube can help ease the pain. Lather some lube both inside and around the anal opening, and on whatever you are planning to put inside it. Make sure you are using water based lubricant with latex condoms.

Slow it down

This is sound advice for trying anything new. When it comes time for penetration during anal sex, start out slow and avoid trying to rush it in order to get it over with. Tense muscles are what cause anal sex to be so painful, so be sure to take the time to relax and ease your way into it. Start off with stimulating the outer area of the anus, and gently massaging it until you’re comfortable working your way through.

It’s perfectly fine to start by penetrating just a little bit, and then stop and repeat until it starts to get easier. The most difficult part will undoubtedly be pushing the penis through the anus hole, so feel free to play around with it beforehand and take your time in adjusting to it. You can even try warming up by using something smaller to insert, like your finger or a toy. Being patient is the most effective way to successfully have anal sex without additional pain or discomfort.

Condom use

Just like vaginal sex, you should always be protected. Just because you can’t get pregnant from anal sex, doesn’t mean you can’t still catch sexually transmitted infections through anal penetration, which is why it’s crucial to wear a condom. Wear a condom even if you’re just sticking to anal sex to ensure safety, but make sure you switch the condoms in between vaginal and anal sex.

Communication is key

Effective communication between both partners is a must for the best experience possible. Make sure you remain in constant communication with each other throughout the partner, asking if certain steps are okay to take. Even consider using a safe word that can be said if one of you starts to get too overwhelmed by the ordeal, or needs the other to slow down and be gentler. Anal sex can be a completely enjoyable and pleasurable experience, but only if two people are willing to communicate in order to make it so.

Having anal sex for the first time can seem like an overwhelming pursuit, but by preparing yourself and being willing to ease your way into it, it can be an enjoyable experience for both of you. It’s important to remember to not let anyone force you into doing it if you’re not completely comfortable, and that it’s okay to put a halt on anal penetration in the midst of the act if it becomes uncomfortable or painful.

That being said, anal sex can easily be a fun and hot sexual endeavor. By following these beginner tips, you’ll be able to firmly prepare and brace yourself for this new adventure and let the sensations begin.

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