Why You Can’t Get Hard and What to Do About It

You’ve got the lights dimmed, the music playing, and the mood set just right for a romp in the sheets with your partner. But then the unthinkable happens: you just can’t seem to get aroused. It happens to most men at some point in their lives; for some it’s a common occurrence and for others it’s a once in a while deal. There’s nothing worse than your penis being the only thing stopping you from having sex.


But there’s good news. There are plenty of reasons why this might be happening, so don’t be discouraged. Along with these reasons, there are plenty of solutions that can save you the hassle and embarrassment of being unable to perform.

Here some of the reasons erectile dysfunction occurs and what you can do about it:

1. Alcohol

Maybe you’ve had quite a few drinks at the bar and you’re feeling a bit tipsy. Or maybe you’ve been pounding shots for the past couple of hours and you’re completely hammered. Either way, alcohol can factor into your erection difficulties. Drinking too much can make it difficult to get hard and remain hard. And while hitting back those drinks may seem like a good idea at the time, your penis won’t be giving you any favors later on.

This is a perfectly preventable problem. If you plan on having sex, don’t drink alcohol beforehand or try to reduce the effects of alcohol by switching to water throughout the night and cutting back on the beers. Even so, this “whiskey dick” phenomenon is only temporary, and your erections will go back to their normal functioning when you’re sobered up.

2. Drugs

Both recreational drug use and prescription medications can affect your ability to get it up. The harder drugs, such as cocaine, heroin, and Oxycontin, all can cause erectile difficulties, and even marijuana has been linked to sexual problems. If you stay away from that type of recreation, your prescription medication may actually be the culprit. Anti-anxiety medications, anti-depressants, painkillers, cold syrup, heartburn medicine, and many more medications can have an impact on your erection capabilities.

The answer for recreational drugs is simply not to use them if you plan on having sex, or at least wait until you sober up before trying. Dealing with other medications that you actually need can be a little bit trickier. Try altering your intake so you are taking lower doses. However, if it’s a prescribed medication, consult with your doctor for advice before changing your dosage, and see if there are any alternatives.

3. Exhaustion

Fatigue and exhaustion affect all of us some time or another. Being overtired can impact your sex drive and limit your ability to maintain arousal. It can be difficult to motivate your sex drive when you’re constantly overworked. When your body is run down from the struggles of a busy schedule, sex doesn’t even seem like something your body can accomplish.

Taking care of your well-being is important, both physically and mentally. You need to be in a good head space to be able to enjoy sex and achieve arousal. Simply try taking care of your body better. Eat healthy meals, get some sleep, and try to relax after a stressful day to unwind before doing the deed.

4. Bedroom Anxiety

Getting a little bit of stage fright in the bedroom is a pretty normal thing for some men. We live in a world that obsesses over the trivialities of appearances, and the appearances of our private parts don’t escape the scrutiny. Being self-conscious about these appearances and concerned over what our partner is thinking can really be a mood killer, and make it difficult for men to get hard. Performance anxiety is one of the most common reasons for erectile problems.

The best way to get around this snafu is to just relax. It might be difficult, but you won’t be able to get aroused unless you let go of those insecurities. Talk to your partner about your anxieties so they can assure you that there is nothing to worry about. Create a relaxed, sexy atmosphere that makes it easy to get lost in the moment.

5. Caffeine and Nicotine

If you’re an avid cigarette smoker or are addicted to your coffee fix, this might be the culprit for your erectile issues. Caffeine and nicotine can severely impact your erections, making it difficult to maintain hardness because your nervous systems are getting caught up in the effects.

So what should you do? Simple. Try to cut back on both. Avoid drinking coffee before sex, and try to stave off that cigarette craving until after you’ve finished in the bedroom. After all, there’s nothing less sexy than a limp penis coupled with the jitters.

6. Medical condition

It’s entirely possible that your erectile dysfunction is the result of an underlying medical condition. There are a handful of medical health problems that can affect your ability to become aroused, such as diabetes, depression and high blood pressure. These can occur at any point in your life, and you may not even be aware that you have a medical condition.

If you’ve tried everything and nothing seems to be working, you should see your doctor to determine the cause of your erection problems. Your doctor might be able to help diagnose you and prescribe you medicine to get these side effects under control.

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